Could Remain This Close
by all.out.carby
Summary: Contains spoilers. So...watch out. Based on the promo for this week's episode. Chapter 3 is up.
1. Dead Again

Yet another stand-alone. Whoa.  
  
Careful. Spoilers for alla ya who haven't seen any of the premiere. Not big ones, but they're here somewhere.   
  
  
  
  
-  
  
  
  
  
"Well," Carter said, pulling on his shirt. "I've never done that before."  
  
Abby laughed quietly as she pulled on her shirt, also and shook her hair with five fingers. Attempting to comb through it, she pulled on it strongly and felt small drops of water fall down her back. "Really? Never been skinny-dipping?"  
  
Carter sighed, now in the comfort of his somewhat dry but sandy shirt. "Nope." He watched her struggle with her wet hair and smiled. "You?"  
  
She smiled, embarrassed he guessed, and shook her head. "First time."  
  
"Ah," Carter said, staring as she reached down for her shoes, her damp tresses still hiding her face. She returned to meet his face, pushing her hair behind her ears. They shared another small smile before heading to the end of the beach.   
  
"Two weeks in a hospital," he said. "I said it before, but its still weird."  
  
Abby nodded silently and listened for more.  
  
"Sometimes I can't wait to get home and go to bed," he went on. "Stuck there, and for some reason I appreciate it more than I figure I should have."  
  
Abby nodded again. "I know what you mean."  
  
Carter looked at her, her head bent toward the sand. Yet another smile crept across his face as he joined her glare toward the ground they walked upon. When Abby began to giggle solemnly, he looked up.  
  
"What?"  
  
" 'Chaos theory,' " she said. "Butterflies and tornadoes."  
  
  
  
  
--  
  
  
  
"Ugh," she said, coming through the door. Carter followed. She let him shut the door behind the two of them. Throwing her keys lazily, sloppily onto the nearest piece of furniture. He fell onto the couch next to her and laid his head back on the cushion, shutting his eyes.  
  
"I can't believe," he said, "that two weeks ago - "  
  
"I know," Abby interrupted. She giggled. "I can't believe we stayed in there for two weeks. Surprise I didn't attempt to get outta there or something." She rested her head on his shoulder, closing her eyes as well. She sighed.  
  
He nodded gently, still focusing on that mess of hair staring back up at him. He reached out to touch it, unaware of his own behavior, but she stood too soon.  
  
"I'm gonna take a shower." She leaned back, in attempt to stretch slightly.   
  
He nodded. " 'Kay."  
  
She looked at him while he turned to put his face in his hands. Obviously contemplating something, she pursed her lips in thought. She gave in. "Come on."  
  
He looked up at her, but didn't disagree.   
  
  
  
  
--  
  
  
  
  
The water was warm enough. It was hot. It fell down his back smoothly, but he barely felt it. She wasn't facing him. Her hair was pulled up messily, but he still wanted to reach out and feel it. Once again, she stopped him without knowing and met his face.   
  
Something in the atmosphere turned more serious. There wasn't a word either of them could think of for it. Not that it mattered; for at that moment, all both of them could comprehend was the other's bare body pressed up against there's.  
  
Carter didn't take one second for granted, and neither could Abby.   
  
He'd meant what he said, and he wondered if she had believed him. How he'd waited for the two of them to happen for so long. It was more poetic, more dramatic the way he had mentioned it. "I'm drawn to you...I've been drawn to you for two years." In some ways, he believed she knew. He wondered more, had she felt the same?  
  
He found himself thinking. Actually thinking. Whilst Abby was still mixed in this situation. She could feel only the water and his breath on her neck. Her eyes were closed, without her being aware. Every feeling that she hadn't really experienced so much before was sinking in, washing over her entire body in one wave. Rushing and intense.   
  
But so romantic.  
  
In any other situation, she'd laugh at herself for being so unlike her. But she couldn't now. It was impossible. Emotionally, physically, mentally impossible...  
  
Carter extended his hand slowly. He expected her to shrink back at his touch, but she came closer. He didn't take time to act surprised, although he shouldn't have been. Should he?  
  
She'd waited long enough, she thought. The moment he'd touched her shoulder, she'd inched her way inward. Her eyes were still sealed, and her chin was less than an inch from his shoulder. Perfect.   
  
He bent in to her neck. Finally, he could be so close to her. He'd enjoyed every moment like this. He knew he'd never tire of it. Never ever.   
  
He breathed next to her. Her skin was so close. If he leant forward, perhaps one more inch, he'd be able to kiss her.  
  
He didn't think twice. Hesitating would be stupid. He arched his neck the slightest to meet hers. His lips barely found her skin. She breathed out onto his nearby shoulder, convincing Carter to continue.   
  
Abby felt every move. Her chest, her stomach was touching his, lying against it. She couldn't see his face, but she could feel it. On her neck, burning with every action. One flame after the other. She wanted to pull him closer, as if it were even possible, but she couldn't move. She was paralyzed for that one instant. Then more after that.  
  
Her lips parted, just barely, to draw short breaths in. Almost gasps. Their one, shared feeling danced around the two of them, wrapping their bodies, and bringing them closer together, just as she desired.  
  
Carter felt her moving closer. He knew if they were somewhere else, he would smile. He was too distracted by the beautiful woman next to him. He couldn't move. Just one move was working for him.  
  
There was one hand tracing free patterns on her shoulder. Another was loosely running up and down her thighs. His lips were traveling to the bottom of her neck to her jaw line, where she would bend her head back, hoping for him to come further.  
  
But he would always fall back downward to her neck.  
  
Abby reached up to touch that one hand on her shoulder. That was all she wanted to do. Feel the man who was treating her like this. Treating her as if she was the only thing on the planet to him. It wasn't something that she'd felt in any other relationships.  
  
Well, partially. Maybe other men had treated her like this in some ways, but this was different. For right now, *he* was the only thing that mattered to her. As long as they could remain this close.  
  
She wanted to tell him that. Something like it.  
  
"Thank you," was all she could whisper.  
  
"For what?" he murmured against her neck, after a small moment of silence.  
  
She felt her eyelids separate for one second, then shut again, too caught in the hold he had on her. "I've never been in a relationship with a man who kisses me like you do." She reached up and put her hands carelessly on his neck, pointing down his back.  
  
He felt himself shudder at the touch, but in an appreciative way. And it was when she spoke again that he wanted to bring his hands to her.   
  
He didn't know how to respond. He pulled back and looked at her, into her brown eyes. She didn't open them until she knew that he was in front of her.  
  
Her eyes opened slowly. He waited for them, so she knew he was looking at her. She looked up at him as if he might not be able to understand what she had said.  
  
But he did. And she knew he did.  
  
He finally bent to kiss her on her lips. The water fell onto the two of them in a warm river. In fact, it was warmer than either remembered. It was hot, steam rising from their backs.  
  
Neither of them felt it.  
  
When they separated, they only reached down to meet again.  
  
After all this time she'd been unsure of herself, she felt at home in this one man's arms. It was new to her, sure. But this was what she wanted. She knew it. She felt it right there. She was exposed to the man, John Carter. She wanted to reach up and run her fingers through his hair, in any way to tell him how she felt.  
  
He pulled away and saw her looking up at him. It seemed perfect. He finally put out a hand to touch that hair he had waited so long to feel. It ran through his fingers softly, gracefully. He sighed aloud, deeply relishing the woman in front of him.  
  
And this one, wonderful gift they'd shared.  
  
  
  
--  
  
  
  
There's another stand-alone.  
  
I can't wait until episode two... As cruel as it sounds to all of my international buddies out there, I have to say, "I love the USA!" (And Thursdays!)  
  
*me* 


	2. Walk Like a Man

Carter's eyes slowly opened to greet a seemingly blinding light seeping from the hallway into her bedroom, door quite ajar. A hand drew instinctively to his face to shield his eyes. He frowned, pondering the new existence of the illumination.  
  
A sigh stirred from the bathroom across the hall, bringing him to a realization. He barely smiled, exhausted, and fell back to the pillow. He attempted to go back to sleep until she entered the room. He left his eyes open just enough to see her grace the room, pulling up her hair into a lazy ponytail.   
  
She yawned and slid into the covers next to him. Carter closed his eyes as she began to turn his way. Leaning toward him so close that he could feel her breathe, she kissed him three times: Once between the eyes, once on his nose, and then a slightly longer one on his lips.  
  
He could feel her staring at him. Or watching him. Her fingers touched his cheeks, running downward along his face. Then she put her hand on his neck and kissed his top lip one more time before turning around again, sliding nicely into his shelter.  
  
"Home late," he whispered, making her jump slightly. She shifted her head slightly and faced him.  
  
"Yeah, we got a little carried away." She laughed quietly and nestled deeper into the pillow, and further into his warm body.  
  
"Carried away?"  
  
She shook her head, moving against him again. "Just wanted to let off some steam. Long day, you know. It really did something for Chen - "  
  
"Did you have fun?" he asked, more insisting. Insisting in a way as demanding an answer.  
  
She sensed the odd feeling between them. "Um, yeah. It was packed in there though. I tell you, Susan picks the weirdest places. Lava Lounge and this time some chamber decorated with glowsticks."  
  
She laughed a little.  
  
"What did you do?"  
  
She turned a little more, directly facing him. "Is there something wrong?" She held her head with her hand elevated by her elbow. "You were kind of weird before I left, too. I shrugged it off, but - "  
  
"Nothing's wrong," he replied with a quick smile, clearly fake, and lifted himself to turn the other way. He closed his eyes immediately, hoping he'd fall asleep before she had another question.  
  
"Something's wrong," she said, putting her hand on his shoulder to pull him her way. "What is it?"  
  
He snatched his shoulder from her grasp and shook his head. "I'm tired."  
  
"God, Carter," she sighed, falling back harshly to her pillow. "Just tell me what the problem is. No one should have to guess like this."  
  
"Did you drink?"  
  
"Oh, my God," she said, throwing a hand over her eyes. "I swear to God, Carter - "  
  
"Answer it then," he answered. "Did you drink?"  
  
"I drank a little," she spoke, almost quiet. "Then I stopped."  
  
He shook his head roughly and stood from the bed, in shirt and his shorts. He scrambled around the room to find his clothes, already still shaking his head.  
  
"What are you doing?" she asked, standing. "Carter, stop."  
  
"I told you, Abby," he said, grabbing his shirt and pants and pulling them on. His hands fumbled on the buckle stupidly. He groaned as he continued. "This is going to get difficult if - "  
  
"Its going to get difficult?" she questioned, stepping away from the bed and following him on his run around the room. "I told you, Carter. I stopped. I knew when to stop - "  
  
"I don't mean to get in the way," Carter interrupted oddly, "but you're an alcoholic, Abby. You aren't allowed to stop, because you're never supposed to start."  
  
"You're not in charge of me Carter," she said reasonably. "I told you, I knew what I was doing."  
  
"No," he said, picking up his final product. "You didn't, Abby. You know that... you're smarter than that. You know you can't do things like this in your condition. It won't justify - "  
  
"My condition?"  
  
"Wake up, Abby!"  
  
Abby watched Carter walk out of the room angrily. Carter was halfway through the living room when she finally found her legs and began toward him.  
  
"Stop," she said, her voice quieter as he opened the door and brought them to the hallway. She was aware that she was still in flannel pants and a shirt, but she didn't mind. "Stop, Carter."  
  
He didn't. He kept walking. Down the stairs and through the doors at the bottom.  
  
"Carter!"  
  
"Aren't you finished yet?" he asked, walking away from her coming through the doors. "You don't ever have any shoes on! What are you doing?"  
  
She didn't take the time to look down at her feet, cased in slippers. "I'm not finished until you listen to me."  
  
"I'm listening, go ahead," he said, still angrily gaining pace.  
  
"No you're not."  
  
"Talk!"  
  
She picked up her speed as well. "I appreciate that you care, John, but you have to let me deal with my own problems. I'm not impossible, I'm not handicap - "  
  
"That's not what this is about," he said.   
  
"Would you care to tell me what it is about, then?" she asked, sneering. "Because from what I picked up back there, that's *exactly* what it was about."  
  
"Forget it," he stammered, shivering in slight cold. A sudden zephyr. That hardly worked now. "Forget it. Go back. I'll see you at work tomorrow."  
  
They'd reached the stairs, now.  
  
"So you want to continue this dispute at the admit desk, the lounge, a trama room," she said sarcastically.   
  
He kept going. Up the stairs. "See you tomorrow, Abby."  
  
"No," she shot. "You're just going to jump on that train and ignore this all tonight?"  
  
"You're in your pajamas," he said without turning around.  
  
"I don't care," she said. They reached the platform. "You're important to me. Don't do this - "  
  
"You're important to me, too!" he shouted, whipping around to face her. She was taken aback by this, slightly stirred as she stood there. "That's why I give a damn, Abby. Okay?"  
  
He started off, toward the man at the boarding area, fishing cents from his pockets.  
  
"Wait," she repeated, causing him to turn one last time.  
  
"Stay here and talk to me."  
  
"I care about you," he said.   
  
"I know you do," she said. "I know. I'm sorry. It had been a long day, you know."  
  
"Please don't use that as an excuse."  
  
"Carter - "  
  
"No," he said, putting a hand up. "If you want to keep me right here, we're keeping it civil. All I ask is that you get some help. Listen to it. Please don't end up somewhere that you shouldn't be."  
  
"That I shouldn't be?" She threw her hands in the air. "Where should I be?"  
  
He sighed. Again. "With me. And I should be with you."  
  
She looked at him oddly. "What are you saying?"  
  
"I'm saying that," he began, but stopped shortly. Looking up at the sky, for advice or condolence from stars. "That I love you."  
  
She watched him for a moment. She'd heard the words.   
  
"And that's the reason I can't see you do this to yourself," he said, quietly now. "Because I don't want anything to happen to you. And don't fight it, because you know perfectly well the danger you get yourself into with this habit."  
  
She nodded.  
  
"What?"  
  
"I didn't say anything."  
  
"You said yes."  
  
"I nodded."  
  
They both looked at the other. Both frowning, neither wanting to look away.  
  
"But okay," she said, coming toward him. "And, I love you." She stuttered on her words, barely believing what she finally said.  
  
He nodded and bent down to meet her in a slow kiss, forgetting about the weight dragging on one of his arms. She put a steady hand against his cheek.  
  
"Promise me you're going to - "  
  
"Get help, I know," she said, carrying on with a gesture of her hands. "I will. I promise."  
  
"Good."  
  
Silence drifted near and sat between them. The wind whipped her hair around and stirred an uncomfortable chill about her arms.  
  
"Now come home," she said smirking. "Because I'm freezing."  
  
He hesitated, but smiled. They walked home without a word and slid back into bed, assuming a familiar position. Muttering three words to the other, sharing another kiss, they fell to sleep again in the other's arms.  
  
  
--  
  
  
I am so sure it will **not** go that way, (lol) But like I said before, I think this seems like a perfect episode for the two of them to share those three lovely words! I know this'll be the fourth ep that they've been dating, but come on! In ERLand, that's like a month or something. They usually stage each episode a week apart... and there was an extra two weeks in quarantine... that's more than a month! It's possible. ;) With Abby 'n Carter angst (mainly *Abby* angst) that could slow things down a bit. Ha.  
  
Manda 


	3. One Can Only Hope

Abby dropped off her armful of charts into their allocated spots at the admit desk and yawned. Pouting slightly, she looked around for the one person she needed right now. Where was he?  
  
She sighed. There he was.  
  
"Could you dispo the baby for me?" she asked him, rubbing her finger over her chin. She looked up at him with frustration.   
  
He ignored her and walked into the lounge. Her frown deepened, her brow in a crazed bend, and she followed him inside. She threw open the door and stormed over to him next to his locker.  
  
"Would you grow up?" she asked, crossing her arms.   
  
"Suspended," Luka said, his voice heavy. "Pending investigation."  
  
"Oh," she said, as he started to take his coat from his locker. She breathed out uncomfortably, arms now lingering at her sides. "Was it - "  
  
"Doesn't matter," he said with a sarcastic raise of his eyebrows. "And I'm sure you don't care."  
  
"Oh, Luka, please - "  
  
"See you later, Abby," he muttered, clashing with Carter as he came in.  
  
"Dr. Kovac," Carter said in a tipping-your-hat sort of mood.  
  
Luka stopped in the doorway, looking at Carter with his hands stuffed into the pockets of his lab coat. He coughed to clear his throat and turned back to Abby. "Get him to discharge your baby."  
  
Abby's mouth twisted into an expression of disapproval. Disapproval of his attitude. She stood with a weary smile now as Carter walked toward her. He finally stood in front of her, crossing the settling sands and placed his two feet before hers. She kept her eyes on his, smirking as he followed, and shrugged playfully.  
  
He shrugged back, letting her soft laugh befall her. She hooked her arms around his neck.  
  
"What's wrong with him?"  
  
"Who cares?"  
  
"Did he discharge 'the baby'?" he asked, his hands finding themselves on her waist.  
  
She straightened herself up. "Who cares?"  
  
He smiled and watched her grin grow. He tilted his head to the side and drew his face nearer to hers. Letting their lips meet, she twisted her two hands together carelessly behind his neck. When one hand of his massaged her back through her coat, she felt a hand of hers consciously make its own move against his hair, matted against his head now, and hold it there.  
  
"What time is your brother getting here?" he asked against her.  
  
She strengthened her hold. "Four."  
  
He held the kiss against her lips. "My shift ends in half an hour."  
  
She nodded again and pulled him closer to her, her arms completely draped over his neck. "Mmm-mm."  
  
He laughed softly with her lips and pulled apart from her. He kissed her neck, nose, and jaw as she stood there. She was standing with closed eyes and an unmistakable smile. When she opened her eyes, Carter was smiling as well.   
  
"I gotta go," he said.  
  
"Yeah, I know," she said, placing a hand on either side of his neck, then running down onto the scrubs top he wore. "Half an hour?'  
  
He nodded, running warm, single fingers over her hands.  
  
"'Kay," she whispered. "I'll wait."  
  
He laughed as she kissed his chin.   
  
"Discharge that baby, please," she added as she moved out of the lounge.  
  
  
  
--  
  
  
  
"Navy Pier," Carter said aloud. "The pride and joy of Chicago. Well, one of the many."  
  
"So I've heard," Eric laughed. He wrapped an arm around his date - an Amy - and brought her near his shoulder. She eagerly clutched him back and kissed his cheek.  
  
Abby had already felt Carter's hold on her, his hand snake around her long before they'd arrived. While Eric and Amy managed to whisper to each other, Carter and Abby stared up at the towering Ferris wheel. Strung with lights, showering the distance of the crowds in awe, Carter and Abby yielded to its stature.  
  
"You aren't afraid of heights are you?"  
  
She looked up at him and gathered closer. "Nope. You?"  
  
He shook his head and turned around, searching for Eric and Amy, who had somehow walked slower. "How about a ride on the Ferris wheel?"  
  
"Does it go fast?" Amy asked, peering upward and biting her lip. Abby felt that she could roll her eyes, but kept to herself.  
  
"Nah," she answered. "It's one of those historical types. It takes seven minutes to go around once, and you're done."  
  
Eric nodded. "What do you think?" Amy nodded.  
  
"Alright."  
  
Carter cast his eyes into Abby's mess of hair, staring back at up at him. He waited for Abby to glance back, until she ultimately did. He took her hand in his and started toward the collection of people waiting. It wasn't long before they realized that Eric and Amy were dawdling far behind them.  
  
"Let's just get on without them," Abby giggled.  
  
"Your own brother?" Carter asked sarcastically, smiling to the man as he boarded the gondola with Abby's hand around his own. They were seated next to each other, her eyes following Eric and Amy as they entangled themselves in the crowd. Eric's eyes caught Abby's, shook his head and gestured toward his girlfriend.  
  
"Oh, please," Abby said. "She's afraid of the Snail's Ferris wheel."  
  
"Shh," he laughed.  
  
"Oh, she can't hear me," she said turning to Carter. His face was close to hers.  
  
"I know that," he said as the ride started, softly and slowly. The carriage barely rocked in the wind as the sun set in front of them over the lake. She looked to the scene, then to his tender smile, placing two lips into it.  
  
"I feel like I'm sixteen."  
  
He stared at her eyes, two pools of brown easily inviting him to swim.  
  
She lowered herself into his embrace again and shuddered in the cold, welcoming arms around her.   
  
  
--  
  
  
Felt fuzzy tonight, decided to disperse the fuzz. Ha ha.  
  
-mandy 


End file.
